The stories we never heard

I was in the city before 8:30 am, on a Sunday morning. Only a Sunday, would you be lucky enough to see more buses and less people, more noise and less talks. Well, here I was, hunting for a cafe with unlimited wifi. I knew my love for coffee and new people would take me to places and I was planning to discover the hidden gems, before it’s time to relocate. 

So I hopped on to the bus to West End, one of the most happening suburbs or so you would feel on a Friday night. I must say, this place gives you all the feels and highs even without alcohol. So, the cafe I was supposed to go to was called Avid Reader - sounds like a treat with the utmost combination of old books and fresh coffee. 

For someone like me with a poor sense of direction, I am so glad to be in an era of Google Maps. The bus stopped right outside the cafe, but hey, this wasn’t Avid Reader. I wasn’t so happy about Google Maps anymore and I chose to get in this new place which was giving me good vibes. For that moment, I felt more of a tourist in the place I have called home for the past two years. 

The first thing I did was find a nice spot with the street view, plug point and get WiFi access. Somehow, this place looked familiar. I kept recollecting all the cafes in Brisbane to find some connection. I was sure I am coming to this place for the first time, until a customer came in and asked where the washroom was. And it suddenly clicked. 

My brain worked faster than the Internet and I was back in 2016. I had been here, almost a year back. I had been here before but the setting was different. It was a busy Saturday night and the place was jammed with people rejoicing to good music and more drinks. I was still recovering from homesickness and using food as a reward. And here I was, bonding with a complete stranger, cheering to the fact that we both were lost but at least, we were both here. 

Only if we cared to hear more stories, we would know that behind those happy smiles that we see on social media, there’s a lot more going on. The stories, that we might not take pride in telling people because we don’t want to confess that we are broken. We are all trying our best, our individual best to keep up with life that happened and wake up everyday to make it an ounce better than yesterday. I wish life was more about the real stories than the masked emotions. And if you’re someone going through the mid life crisis or the ‘I haven’t got it all figured out’ phase, please feel free to share your story with me. We might be captivated in our own thoughts but maybe all you need is a soul that listens to you, a soul that empathises. 

Hello Home 2.0

Studying abroad was my childhood dream. Honestly, just a whimsy which grew wilder because of those clichéd Bollywood movies! I lived this one. I read the stories where people talked on how they miss home and the food and the people but my story was different. In ten months, I found my own little world in Brissy. 

Ahmedabad to Australia was a giant leap and it wasn’t until I reached Singapore that the feeling sank in. Damn! Was I really going to another continent, all by myself? I couldn’t even ask someone to pinch me. Fortunately, I had my godparents pick me up from the airport and take me to Gold Coast. I cannot thank them enough for all the love and care, till today. But then, I was in Brisbane. I was befriending the world. Well, at least representatives of the world. 

I was living with people from different countries. No matter how fancy it sounds, four girls in one house isn’t really a house at peace. If it wasn’t for our lovely landlady, we would be pulling each other’s hair. (No not literally, just have silent wars maybe?) We had our ups and downs but these strangers became my family. Our landlady was our fairy godmother who made us cupcakes and vanilla slice. 

Food was not much of a problem for me since I loved cooking. For emergencies, I carried my stach of Maggi Masala everywhere. Later did I realise, Maggi masala WAS the problem. I was missing out on such amazing food and zests my taste buds were not even aware of. I literally had to graduate from calling everything bland (and adding red chilli on top of it) to accepting different cuisine for my housemate to take me for Yum Cha. I have tried Beef, Pork, Chicken feet and seafood that I can’t even recall. I love Malaysian and Mexican food. I consume Indian food just once a week. Yes, I said it. 

You know the only problem there is? Doing the dishes. No wonder that’s the reason all couples fight. I used to hate doing the dishes and I still do. Sundays are only reserved for cleaning the house and doing the laundry. But then, that’s how we grew up. Our parents put us in such comfortable cocoon that doing all the chores for the first time gives all of us a reality check. 

On top of all this, I paid the bills and I paid them by myself. I was working and studying and meeting new people. I met strangers I befriended. Strangers who became my family and when it is time to go back home to see everyone, I am struggling with goodbyes. I found my new home here with these lovely people. Even though I am so excited to see my family, I am not ready to leave Australia for six weeks. 

Six weeks is a very long time to stay away and I had no clue I would say this but suddenly, this home seems closer than India. These people seem dearer. More importantly, I am going to miss the feeling of being a grownup, of irresponsibly taking all responsibilities and breezing in the independence. 

Maybe the moment I go back to India, I might still be the 21 year old who left home; not the almost 22 year old who saw so much more of life in a span of ten months.

Day 4: Taking another train to Neverland!

I got on the train half an hour before departure. That rarely happens in the peak hour of traffic but I couldn't contain the excitement of traveling again, all by myself. I love the joy of traveling, discovering new places and meeting new people. It's beautiful how you can meet another person and be a part of their story, till another stop or maybe just for a few minutes.

Usually I love talking to strangers I might be traveling with but the chirpy soul that I am simply hides in the corner, indulging in a good book or just faintly looking outside the window. It's a different feeling altogether to keep moving forward with the lost count of hours. If you have a lot of time in your hand, take a trip to any destination, alone. It will take you to different places in your head, it shall help you introspect and cross the murky waters of your imaginary world. Most of all, it will solve most of your problems.

If you are a keen observer of your surroundings or people, traveling shall be a treat for your eyes and ears. I remember the first time I took a flight to Mumbai, with the fear of flying for the first time. The current news of missing airplanes doesn't make it any easy. I just chose to observe people and I swear it was the most hilarious flight I boarded on. The first time flyers behave like the kids at the age of four and their zeal soars higher as the plane takes off. It's like a human was suddenly given wings and the giddiness makes you feel you like a roller coaster ride.

But every mode of traveling is surrealistic in it's own way, with all the ups and downs. The road trips for the different stops you'll take on your way, for food or those creepy public washrooms, talking to the locals when you lose your way or to know the best Dhabba. And most of all, for the beautiful view around, the greens and the wild winds.

The train journeys that needless to say will be long enough to make you cringe and crib if you hate kids and might as well be fun if you like talking to people and knowing about their stories. Take time to look at the view outside if you happen to look at the foggy atmosphere or the greenery amidst mountains. And lastly, the flight journeys. I don't know how it feels to be on a flight for more than three hours but except for the beautiful clouds and free food (if included), I haven't been a fan of traveling through an airplane.

So traveling could be fun only if you're ready to adjust, to get used to change in terms of people, culture and the food. If nausea, acrophobia and homesickness shall take over you, you'll hate it from the moment it starts. So just let yourself free in the spirit of something new, in the mode of discovering something new about yourself and exploring your soul. Traveling is like reading, you'll live so many lives and relive so many moments when you free yourself. Come alive. Find peace beyond your comfort. And take the next train to Neverland!

Day 3: Rest in Peace, Chivalry.

It was a chilly night and the locals were cozying up in their homes. Outside the castle, there was an old woman looking up at the gates, trembling with cold. She was waiting for someone to open the door of kindness and let her stay under their roof. She came to the king only to beg for a rugged shawl to save her from the winter that could take her life.

From far away, she could hear the footsteps of a soldier. He was the knight in shining armor who walked towards the lady and gave her a warm quilt to comfort her. That's where chivalry came from, it was a trait of the knights. The valor and bravery that was possessed by the entire army. Today, we limit chivalry to pulling the chair or opening the door.

When I happened to ask some of my friends what chivalry meant to them, the majority responded with this answer. But can we limit courtesy and chivalry merely to these actions? Chivalry was inculcated in men, as to show that women are special and need to be treated that way. But with the changing culture and the society trying to portray women as equals, people tend to consider it sexist.

A man would open the door for his girlfriend or wife but will he continue to do that for the fellow strangers behind him while he's coming out of a store? A beautiful woman might attract the attention of people while she meets with an accident but will a middle-aged woman be treated the same way at the same place? Why do we associate chivalry with men, that too a romantic connotation?

A gentleman needs to protect a woman, treat her with care instead of taking advantage of her. It could be to help her with her bags, courting her or to protect her from the evils of the society. With the constant increase in rapes and violence against women, we can see chivalry die ahead of us. The overpowering men could easily take our advantage and that's where, we fear men when they try to act courteous. We don't wish to feel weak compared to men and that's why, we try to protect ourselves from those pleasing acts.

If a drunk woman is going home, a gentleman would drop her safely instead of taking advantage of her body. With the advertisements like 'Boys don't cry to Boys don't make someone cry', we can see the blurred image of how our society has tarnished the act of chivalry. The ugly cinema has portrayed that women fall for a guy who acts cheesy and creeps her out. Eve teasing, cheesy one-liners and objectifying women was never a turn on.

The fault lies in the upbringing, in the books he didn't read or the women he didn't respect. The fault lies in the parents who made him hide his emotions and that overpowering masculinity turned him to an outrageous beast. The fault lies in the friends who turned him from a decent guy to a creepy hooligan. We can't see the society going back from civilized to barbaric times.

We would just want to go back to the era of Titanic, where men were ready to sacrifice their lives so that women and children could be saved. We would want to go back to the times where we would again feel safe to go to a place in a cab than constantly fearing the man driving. We would only ask for the men to go back and learn the traits of a knight in the shining armor so that we could stay as equals, without the fear of being crushed by our own counterparts.

P.S: Chivalry does exist. So do gentlemen.

Day 2: Baggage Claim

I was the last passenger to board the flight. Heaven knows how I made it to the airport. No, I'm not blaming the traffic; I couldn't underestimate Mumbai. But I didn't wish to go. They all asked me to stay back, to make this city my little paradise instead. But how would I grow if I didn't leave my comfy nest?

Twenty minutes for takeoff and I know, I'm seeing all of it for the last time. These slums and streets, similar faces and creepy walls, fried and diet food at the same place. The overcrowded beaches and empty cafés. But it was too late to change my decision. The fee was paid and my folks were getting used to my absence. I was worried about my dad but I didn't see him break down. He was my pillar and he wouldn't let me cry when I was bidding goodbye.

Looking outside the window at the beautiful green meadows, I feel India does look the prettiest of all. That's okay. I'll get used to a new country but it won't be the same without all the people whom I left behind. I'm not sure if they'll miss me or forget me but at the same time, new place and new people sound really exciting. I won't be answerable to someone for every hour of the day but I wouldn't even be warned about the good and not-so-good people.

I used to hate khichdi when mom cooked it every week but I wonder if I could make it by myself here. Will I even remember the right process without her guidance while I cooked? It's funny how all of a sudden, I will have to talk more to explain things than the silence my friends could interpret. It's already been six hours and I still keep thinking about what's happening back home.

You know how people say your entire life flashes before you when you're about to die? Well, the flashback happens quite often even before death. We were queueing in the aisle to finally get off a ten hour flight. It's sunny and beautiful but it isn't home. Waiting at the baggage claim, I was too lost to find my baggage and therefore took a while to recollect the turquoise ribbon I had put around my bags. 

Oh wait, I've to take a cab because nobody's coming to pick me up at the airport. I cannot drag along 46 kgs of baggage all the way. But the man who was sitting right next to me in the flight chose to help. I wouldn't have recognized him by the way he looked or dressed but only after he went on to welcome me in his Gujju accent did I realize that, I'm not going to be alone here and there's lot more to learn in this unknown land.

Day 1: A New Found Love

Technically, it's the fourth day of this year and some of us have already sipped the mundaneness of routine. Don't we all love the 'Christmas to New Year' Eve' phase? Good food, dressing up and dancing away for the endeared gatherings, lit up with bright lights and beautiful smiles. Ah, the holiday season has just ended and we all couldn't have been more excited about the new year.

It's beautiful how the start of new year is so inspiring for most of us. For all the resolutions we couldn't keep or the goals almost accomplished; a new awakening to trigger that enthusiasm and bracing ourselves to try again. Better grades, lesser weight, finding love or saying goodbye to alcohol; we have our share of happy resolutions. We all seek happiness in these momentary dreams fancies.

For a change, I didn't make any new resolution with rigidity because I don't know; either it's the word that's jinxed or my resolutions are too farfetched. In fact, I made a decision to be happy each day, no matter what (Despite knowing what a big cliché it is!) And I wanted to involve myself in another great passion. My love for food and undefeatable appetite has amazed people but recently I've been going to the kitchen more too often, to create those wonderful finger licking delicacies!

So yes, my new found love is for the art of cooking. I've been cooking a new dish every day, with mom's help and YouTube tutorials. Wholeheartedly. And it gives me immense happiness to cook good food because good food is the shortcut to happiness. You should try it sometime! Cooking while listening to soothing music can be a therapy and the compliments after that perfect dish you made? Bliss indeed!

Also, I knew I hadn't updated my blog for long and that's when the new resolution spirit hit me! I've decided to take up this really cool challenge of writing for 31 days. At least 500 words and I'll weave a new story or different perspective or maybe a mutual feeling that both of us share and you could relate.

So goodbye writer's block and Challenge: Accepted!

Keep reading for more stories.

Till the dark clouds of confusion roll by

There’s a new chapter to a book, a new story to your life. We all have our story which comes with all the twist and turns. With a new chapter, we meet new characters. With every phase that we enter and every new person we meet, it changes us. Our life is just another beautiful book which is waiting in the chaos to be picked by someone.

With the end of school and college, I was done with two major phases of life. I was writing my own story and I had the choice to decide to take up a job or get myself enrolled in college. But which course? Well there I was, with confusion. Forget plans, I didn’t even have a ‘pla’. I chose to go with the flow. Shuffling between a few interviews, I did end up at a job. I entered the world of advertising to be a part of the churning which goes in executing an advertisement.

The first job doesn’t just change you, it’s a slow evolution. Working for nine hours would seem like a nightmare and suddenly expensive fancies might seem more distant. If colleagues aren’t your favourite, you might as well miss those long lost ‘Rishtedaars’ more than the people around you. The going might get tough and the cribbing shall take over you but you’ll learn to survive. You’ll learn to be more mature and value money. And most importantly, you’ll learn to deal with people. Politely.

But, there’s always a ‘but’ in the picture. Most people don’t have everything figured out. You could be among them. I am among them. We tend to go with the flow and we assume that like the rest, we’ll have a perfect plan and everything shall go according to that. We wish that could happen but then we wouldn’t understand life. Suddenly, there wouldn’t be the need of success or failure and life would turn from a roller coaster ride to a never ending road trip without a beautiful view. Wouldn’t that be boring?

We all go through the melancholy once in a while but we need the confusion to get things clear. Those little bumps we come across on our way teach us more than the smooth roads. I’ve been going through that phase, the confusion and the ‘no pla’ phase but we’ll figure it out. The storm shall pass and we’ll learn to dance in the rain. But don’t give up on your dream because that shows you’re weak. And you know you aren’t!

For now, I’ve learnt to wake up with a purpose. I might have had a bad day today but every morning is a new story and every stranger I shall meet could be a new character. Our aspirations are our biggest inspiration. The drama is a part of the story. And if something comes to an end, it might as well be a new beginning.

I read this quote and we all need to read this. That’s our purpose and maybe that shall help you see the sun shining through the dark clouds.

We are at our very best, and we are happiest, when we are fully engaged in work we enjoy on the journey toward the goal we've established for ourselves. It gives meaning to our time off and comfort to our sleep. It makes everything else in life so wonderful, so worthwhile.

Earl Nightingale